4 More Days..... :(

So I realized just about ten minutes ago while having one of those "deep friend" conversations with Fa'ah that I turn 20 years old in less than four more days.  4 days. People, do you understand what this means!?  I'M OLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  :(  I seriously almost started to cry when it hit me.  I don't know why, but turning 20 is seriously feeling almost like a midlife crisis of sorts, and I don't know.  I think it possibly has to do with the fact that I always thought I would be on a mission at 19 and home by 21 and here I am at what should be the hump day of my mission and I haven't even left yet...

Two words...life sucks. 




Or does it?  I have decided that life is what you make it; if I choose to be happy, than invariably I will be happy, but if I don't conciously choose happiness then I am actually choosing to be unhappy and remain stagnant in my personal development.  So, even though I am really struggling with this whole 20 years of age thing, here is my goal for my 20's: to accept myself for who I am and to be happy.  I will make myself a better person not because I hate the person I am now, but because I am hopeful for what I can become.  Love is the key here, I must love myself in order to embody positive personal change in my life, and this is something I will do.  Like an "ugly duckling", I will unleash the power within myself to become something great.